Collaborative post
At some point, most parents experience the “moment.” You turn away from your toddler for just a second; you’re about to do something else, and then you hear the sound of your child heading directly for something they shouldn’t touch. Whether it’s the coffee table edge, the dog’s water bowl, or the glass vase (with candles) on the low shelf, the room erupts in a chorus of “no,” “stop,” and “not there.” This occurs so frequently that it becomes as if your primary function is to constantly redirect your child’s hands.
You might create a different type of space, one that allows your child to roam and explore freely without having to continually tell them “no” or “stop.” Many parents refer to this type of space as a “yes space.” Creating a “yes space” requires little to no renovation. Most of what is required is recognizing how children interact with their environment and making a few minor changes.
Removing Adult-Level Hazard Items from Accessible Areas
One of the biggest mistakes many parents make is designing a living space based solely on adult behavior. For example, a family may use their coffee table as a location for mugs, have phone chargers lying on the floor near electrical outlets, and keep decorative objects on lower shelves. To a child, these are invitations to get involved.
Consider a picture of a one-year-old standing in front of a couch and reaching out to a TV remote control and a glass vase with a candle burning inside. Both of those objects are at eye level for the child. Each time the parent removes the object, the curiosity increases.
In general, relocation is usually the easiest solution. Remove hazardous and/or tempting objects to an upper shelf. Keep phone chargers behind a piece of furniture instead of draped along the floor. Store breakable decorative items in cabinets with doors.
Providing “Yes” Objects for the Space
Another area where a room can feel limiting is due to the lack of safe objects for children to interact with. A child enters a space, finds nothing to touch, and immediately reaches out for the first item that looks interesting.
To replace forbidden objects in a well-planned “yes space,” provide objects that encourage exploration. A basket of wood blocks on the floor. Board books on a lower bookshelf. Soft balls or stacking cups in a plastic container.
Solid objects are also important. A child who has access to a basket of blocks located next to the couch often prefers to engage in that activity rather than climbing onto the coffee table.
As recommended by Occupational Therapists, it is beneficial to rotate toys every 1-2 weeks. Limiting the number of options seen keeps children from becoming overwhelmed while still allowing them to remain curious.
Neglecting the Fact that Movement is Part of Play
Children rarely spend extended periods of time in a stationary position. They climb, crawl, roll, and push various objects along the floor. Rooms that only support quiet sitting activities often lead to frustration.
Consider a picture of a toddler who continues to try to climb the arm of the sofa. Is the child being defiant? Perhaps the child simply sees no other option but to climb.
By incorporating basic movement opportunities into the design of a “yes space”, the dynamics of the space can be altered. A foam climbing wedge in a corner. A step-stool is placed near a window. A floor cushion that children can climb over and slide off.
These types of objects allow children to develop balance and coordination skills. Rather than continuing to redirect a child’s physical energy, the space provides a safe outlet for it.
Hiding All Objects from a Child’s View
Occasionally, parents will organize their home so thoroughly that almost everything is hidden from view. Toys are put in containers with lids. Puzzles are placed in cupboards. Books are stored on high shelves. The room may appear organized, but children often lose interest in engaging in activities because there are no objects inviting them to do so.
Visibility fosters independence. When a child can see a puzzle board leaning against a shelf or a basket filled with chunky books, the child can initiate an activity independently.
Open shelving is a good example of this. A low cube shelving unit with three or four objects clearly visible on it is often enough to keep a child engaged in an independent activity for a prolonged period.
A child who can select an object on their own is developing decision-making abilities in a small but significant way.
Expecting Every Room To Work At Once
Most parents experience a tremendous amount of pressure to child-proof an entire house from top to bottom, which can be extremely difficult and often unnecessary.
To achieve the greatest success in creating a Yes Space, you want to create a clear boundary around your designated Yes Space area. Your Yes space may be a designated area of your living room (e.g., a “corner” for children), a gate-enclosed playroom, or a designated area of your kitchen where children can sit and explore as their parents prepare meals.
An example of a Yes Space area is a small rug placed next to a dining table with a basket of blocks, a board book, and a soft mat. The remainder of the room will continue to be arranged to meet adult needs.
Last Thoughts
In many cases, parents will report that the atmosphere of the room changes significantly after they establish a Yes Space. Parents will report that instead of consistently redirecting their children, they will have extended periods of time where their children will be engaged in activities such as stacking blocks or reading books.
When a space is designed to facilitate exploration and movement, children will engage in these behaviors for longer periods of time and hear the word “No” less frequently.